Nancy and I had a great time being involved with Tyler and Stephanie's wedding
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Do you know any of these people?
Abe and Abegail Agenda - They may look sweet and docile but they are like ducks going around the water at your local lake. Everything looks good on the surface but underneath they are kicking up a storm. Normally they are older and rigid in the ways church should be done. Their motto becomes "have it my way."
Charlie and Coleen Critical - It doesn't matter how you do it or what you do they will find a way to criticize it. A pastor told me that a couple approached him with a problem in the church. He listened and suggested that it might be the very thing that God was leading them to do. They got upset with his answer and said "if that is the best you can come up with then we are going to leave the church." Their motto is "why be part of the solution when you can continue pointing out the problem."
Paul and Pauleen Post Modern - this couple thinks we need to find out what music draws the crowd, especially the young crowd and then provide it. They think we have too much preaching and sermons should be short motivational stories that make people feel good. Paul and Pauleen are in to comfort without any conviction. Their motto is "we don't need more conversions in the church we just need to have some good conversations."
Harry and Henrietta Hypocrite - they look good, sing, teach and even hand out cookies on Sunday but they are not genuine. They gossip, tell about how they did things in there former church and even question if leadership is capable. They end up in leadership and sometimes in small groups to the point that they when they get mad and finally leave others go with them.
Their motto is "we are looking good, smelling good and talking good but we just aren't living good."
Ned and Nellie Non-Biblical - this couple when approached about not using their gifts, reading the Bible, or leaving over the color of the carpet use experience and feelings instead of going to the word of God. If they don't feel it then they just don't do it. If you ask, can you support this kind thinking or action based on the Bible they will say things like "not really." Their motto "we don't know what it means but that's ok because it can mean what we want it to mean-right?"
Earl and Edie Expert - This couple lives by the statement "if we want your opinion then we will give it to you." They know what to do and how to do it. Some of the things they share and implement have been on their minds for years and years. And now that the group is gathered and they are the so-called experts the attitude comes out my way or the highway. However sometimes enough is enough, and if challenged they will take their ball and go home! Their motto "it's not as easy as it looks to always be right."
Mack and Mabel Mono-ministry - they take a ministry and own it, do it and build a fence so high around it that it would take an act of congress to get into it! When Mack and Mabel show up they dominate and dictate their own ministry area. There is no Timothy support or back up plan. And if others offer. Their motto for others who want to involve themselves in their ministry "do not go away mad, just go away."
Ted and Thelma Teflon - whenever they are approached regarding problems they have caused you can be sure that nothing sticks to them. Their motto "we didn't do anything wrong, just ask us."
Dick and Darlene Deflective - this couple has the extraordinary ability to put everything back on those that come in contact with them. The strategy is not to deal with the problem but deflect it away from themselves. By the way they are first cousins of Ted and Thelma Teflon. You might hear statements like the following "of course we would join small groups if the leadership team would stop having people in them." Their motto "take it easy greasy because the problem your trying to lay on me has got a long way to slide."
Ben and Bonita Been-Around - This couple looks the part except they have been to 12 other churches over the years. Upon talking to this couple each church they left has been somewhat off in doctrine, method of understanding of this couples skill and abilities. Their motto "we leave right before church discipline can arrive."
Sammy and Sandy Snitch - this couple comes to attend but really never joins. However they call and meet with pastor in order to give inside information on some of the problem people. Their motto "maybe this pastor will confront them on the sin that we are too intimidated to discuss with our family member, friend or co-worker."
Grant and Gertrude Grumpy - it doesn't matter what you preach, teach, or what you do, this couple finds a way to be and stay unhappy. Their motto is "of course we are happy just look at our face."
Charlie and Coleen Critical - It doesn't matter how you do it or what you do they will find a way to criticize it. A pastor told me that a couple approached him with a problem in the church. He listened and suggested that it might be the very thing that God was leading them to do. They got upset with his answer and said "if that is the best you can come up with then we are going to leave the church." Their motto is "why be part of the solution when you can continue pointing out the problem."
Paul and Pauleen Post Modern - this couple thinks we need to find out what music draws the crowd, especially the young crowd and then provide it. They think we have too much preaching and sermons should be short motivational stories that make people feel good. Paul and Pauleen are in to comfort without any conviction. Their motto is "we don't need more conversions in the church we just need to have some good conversations."
Harry and Henrietta Hypocrite - they look good, sing, teach and even hand out cookies on Sunday but they are not genuine. They gossip, tell about how they did things in there former church and even question if leadership is capable. They end up in leadership and sometimes in small groups to the point that they when they get mad and finally leave others go with them.
Their motto is "we are looking good, smelling good and talking good but we just aren't living good."
Ned and Nellie Non-Biblical - this couple when approached about not using their gifts, reading the Bible, or leaving over the color of the carpet use experience and feelings instead of going to the word of God. If they don't feel it then they just don't do it. If you ask, can you support this kind thinking or action based on the Bible they will say things like "not really." Their motto "we don't know what it means but that's ok because it can mean what we want it to mean-right?"
Earl and Edie Expert - This couple lives by the statement "if we want your opinion then we will give it to you." They know what to do and how to do it. Some of the things they share and implement have been on their minds for years and years. And now that the group is gathered and they are the so-called experts the attitude comes out my way or the highway. However sometimes enough is enough, and if challenged they will take their ball and go home! Their motto "it's not as easy as it looks to always be right."
Mack and Mabel Mono-ministry - they take a ministry and own it, do it and build a fence so high around it that it would take an act of congress to get into it! When Mack and Mabel show up they dominate and dictate their own ministry area. There is no Timothy support or back up plan. And if others offer. Their motto for others who want to involve themselves in their ministry "do not go away mad, just go away."
Ted and Thelma Teflon - whenever they are approached regarding problems they have caused you can be sure that nothing sticks to them. Their motto "we didn't do anything wrong, just ask us."
Dick and Darlene Deflective - this couple has the extraordinary ability to put everything back on those that come in contact with them. The strategy is not to deal with the problem but deflect it away from themselves. By the way they are first cousins of Ted and Thelma Teflon. You might hear statements like the following "of course we would join small groups if the leadership team would stop having people in them." Their motto "take it easy greasy because the problem your trying to lay on me has got a long way to slide."
Ben and Bonita Been-Around - This couple looks the part except they have been to 12 other churches over the years. Upon talking to this couple each church they left has been somewhat off in doctrine, method of understanding of this couples skill and abilities. Their motto "we leave right before church discipline can arrive."
Sammy and Sandy Snitch - this couple comes to attend but really never joins. However they call and meet with pastor in order to give inside information on some of the problem people. Their motto "maybe this pastor will confront them on the sin that we are too intimidated to discuss with our family member, friend or co-worker."
Grant and Gertrude Grumpy - it doesn't matter what you preach, teach, or what you do, this couple finds a way to be and stay unhappy. Their motto is "of course we are happy just look at our face."
The learning curve...
As a former pastor of a small church I experienced a tremendous learning curve. Mark Driscoll who pastors a mega-church in Seattle writes a helpful article on the three types of people he finds in the church - the positives, negatives and neutrals. I think this provides a good summary of those that attended the Shepherd's Church before we disbanded. Whenever the negatives have a place of leadership and leave the church then it drastically impacts those who are or who have been neutral. It is amazing when reading an article like this how the names and faces of people from the past come immediately to mind. There are at least two books that could come from those 4 years of our small church experience. Book #1 - "What happens when a small church disbands" and Book #2 "You would not believe what people say to the pastor." And maybe book #3 "You can't use church discipline on me because I'm already gone."
The Positives, Negatives and Neutrals by Mark Driscoll
Every ministry leader needs to be a positive. They also need to know who the positives, negatives, and neutrals are both in official leadership and unofficial leadership in their ministry.
Positives
Positives are people who do gospel things in gospel ways for gospel reasons. They are trusting, supportive, and encouraging. They build bridges and mediate conflict. Positives bring organizational health, work for the good of the gospel over any single issue or cause, and are a blessing because they humbly want the gospel to win. Positives are prone to turn neutrals into positives, while they also work to neutralize negatives. In the Bible, positives are often referred to as shepherds.
Negatives
Negatives are people who do ungospel things in ungospel ways for ungospel reasons. They are distrusting, unsupportive, discouraging, and contentious. They burn bridges, are wounded by bitterness from past hurts, and are often the center of criticism and conflict. Negatives bring organizational sickness, division, and trouble because they are proudly more interested in their cause winning than the gospel and the good of the whole. Negatives tend to draw other negatives toward themselves as factions, and they also prey on neutrals in order to increase their own power and control. In the Bible, negatives are often referred to as wolves.
Neutrals
Neutrals are followers who are easily influenced. They are prone to being unsure, confused, and fearful. Neutrals are often caught in the middle when there is conflict between positives and negatives. A neutral becomes a positive or negative depending upon who their friends are, whom they listen to, what information they have access to, which books they read, and which teachers they look up to. In the Bible, neutrals are often referred to as sheep.
Sadly, in most ministries, the negatives are the most vocal, most exhausting, and most distracting, as well as the least likely to contribute to growth and health. Though they are few, they are often loud and difficult, spreading—as Paul says—like gangrene through the church body (2 Tim. 2:17). Practically, this means that even a few negatives working together can become quite difficult. The Bible reveals that negatives often pair up like two barrels on a gun, as was the case with Jannes and Jambres opposing Moses, Sanballat and Tobiah opposing Nehemiah, and Hymenaeus and Alexander opposing Paul.
How to Stay Positive
For a ministry to remain positive, three things need to occur.
First, the senior leader and the other official and unofficial leaders who wield the most influence must be positives. Further, they must be continually exhorted to remain positives. This means that even when they deal with negative things, they do so in a positive way for the glory of God and the good of his people.
Second, the negatives must not be allowed into leadership. If they are in leadership, official or unofficial, they must be rebuked. Titus 3:10–11 describes this rebuke: "As for a person who stirs up division, after warning him once and then twice, have nothing more to do with him, knowing that such a person is warped and sinful; he is self-condemned." Too often negatives are tolerated for too long; the longer their sin is tolerated, the more toxic the ministry culture becomes. Therefore, unrepentant negatives need to be brought through formal church discipline after their negativity has been documented and addressed; this process may end with their removal from the ministry, if needed. Ministry leaders are often reticent to deal so forthrightly with negatives; however, the longer they are tolerated, the more neutrals they infect with their gangrene.
Third, the neutrals need to be lovingly and patiently informed that they are in fact neutrals and that they need to take responsibility to not give in to negatives. Additionally, neutrals cannot be allowed into ministry leadership because they are prone to be influenced rather than be influencers. Sadly, neutrals are often nominated for and voted in to ministry leadership because they tend to be nice people who are likeable because they are amiable and easily influenced. But they are prone to work toward consensus rather than lead and are therefore not helpful for moving a ministry forward into innovation and growth. Change is controversial and requires someone who is a strong positive to build consensus for change and who is also able to neutralize the negatives rather than being influenced by them.
The Positives, Negatives and Neutrals by Mark Driscoll
Every ministry leader needs to be a positive. They also need to know who the positives, negatives, and neutrals are both in official leadership and unofficial leadership in their ministry.
Positives
Positives are people who do gospel things in gospel ways for gospel reasons. They are trusting, supportive, and encouraging. They build bridges and mediate conflict. Positives bring organizational health, work for the good of the gospel over any single issue or cause, and are a blessing because they humbly want the gospel to win. Positives are prone to turn neutrals into positives, while they also work to neutralize negatives. In the Bible, positives are often referred to as shepherds.
Negatives
Negatives are people who do ungospel things in ungospel ways for ungospel reasons. They are distrusting, unsupportive, discouraging, and contentious. They burn bridges, are wounded by bitterness from past hurts, and are often the center of criticism and conflict. Negatives bring organizational sickness, division, and trouble because they are proudly more interested in their cause winning than the gospel and the good of the whole. Negatives tend to draw other negatives toward themselves as factions, and they also prey on neutrals in order to increase their own power and control. In the Bible, negatives are often referred to as wolves.
Neutrals
Neutrals are followers who are easily influenced. They are prone to being unsure, confused, and fearful. Neutrals are often caught in the middle when there is conflict between positives and negatives. A neutral becomes a positive or negative depending upon who their friends are, whom they listen to, what information they have access to, which books they read, and which teachers they look up to. In the Bible, neutrals are often referred to as sheep.
Sadly, in most ministries, the negatives are the most vocal, most exhausting, and most distracting, as well as the least likely to contribute to growth and health. Though they are few, they are often loud and difficult, spreading—as Paul says—like gangrene through the church body (2 Tim. 2:17). Practically, this means that even a few negatives working together can become quite difficult. The Bible reveals that negatives often pair up like two barrels on a gun, as was the case with Jannes and Jambres opposing Moses, Sanballat and Tobiah opposing Nehemiah, and Hymenaeus and Alexander opposing Paul.
How to Stay Positive
For a ministry to remain positive, three things need to occur.
First, the senior leader and the other official and unofficial leaders who wield the most influence must be positives. Further, they must be continually exhorted to remain positives. This means that even when they deal with negative things, they do so in a positive way for the glory of God and the good of his people.
Second, the negatives must not be allowed into leadership. If they are in leadership, official or unofficial, they must be rebuked. Titus 3:10–11 describes this rebuke: "As for a person who stirs up division, after warning him once and then twice, have nothing more to do with him, knowing that such a person is warped and sinful; he is self-condemned." Too often negatives are tolerated for too long; the longer their sin is tolerated, the more toxic the ministry culture becomes. Therefore, unrepentant negatives need to be brought through formal church discipline after their negativity has been documented and addressed; this process may end with their removal from the ministry, if needed. Ministry leaders are often reticent to deal so forthrightly with negatives; however, the longer they are tolerated, the more neutrals they infect with their gangrene.
Third, the neutrals need to be lovingly and patiently informed that they are in fact neutrals and that they need to take responsibility to not give in to negatives. Additionally, neutrals cannot be allowed into ministry leadership because they are prone to be influenced rather than be influencers. Sadly, neutrals are often nominated for and voted in to ministry leadership because they tend to be nice people who are likeable because they are amiable and easily influenced. But they are prone to work toward consensus rather than lead and are therefore not helpful for moving a ministry forward into innovation and growth. Change is controversial and requires someone who is a strong positive to build consensus for change and who is also able to neutralize the negatives rather than being influenced by them.
Monday, October 12, 2009
Is Rob Bell preaching the gospel?
Chris Rosebrough from Fighting for the Faith analyzes Rob Bell's view of the gospel.
Friday, October 2, 2009
Top 10 Challenges for Small Church Pastors
This is from the blog site of Ed Stezler and very insightful regarding some key issues for pastors of a small church.
1. Time. According to Waggoner, 32 percent of the respondents said they were bivocational pastors and didn't have enough hours in the day to do what they were called to do.
"I read comment after comment which said pastors were under pressure to juggle responsibilities," Waggoner said. "The fact is they have 24 hours a day, seven days a week. They worked at their job somewhere and also dealt with the church. They were tired, drained of energy. They try to fulfill their calling and get the job done. There's no easy way to get it all done.
"All pastors fight that battle. Every leader is tired. But, at the end of the day, they trust the Lord to do the best they can with [the] energy they have and just trust Him."
2. Resistance. Small-church pastors said their congregation doesn't want to change, which leads to stagnation. Pastors have to deal with individuals who want to usurp authority from the pastor, forgetting that it's God who controls His church.
"We have to patiently hold the standard high and teach the Word of God," Waggoner said. "It takes a while for the church to grow biblically ... and takes expositional teaching for the church to get healthy. We can't lower the standards of church. Preaching precedes change. We have to raise the bar of expectations."
3. Lack of commitment from members. Many pastors said they deal with apathy and indifference. Waggoner said it doesn't matter what the size of the church is, but small churches feel it more.
"There are no quick fixes," Waggoner said. "It can't be about the man in the pulpit. We hear so much fluff and stuff. We try to sneak up on people with discipleship. You have to start out with discipleship. We've underestimated the power of a godly man or godly woman."
4. Too few workers. If the church's philosophy is that the pastor is a hired gun, the professional, it will wear the pastor out, Waggoner said. He also said most churches do not have a strategy to equip the laity for ministry.
"You have to teach what the Bible says about the pastor's role," Waggoner said. "I think every church should have a class on teaching spiritual gifts so people ... can take the next step on finding a place in the church ministry. You have to look people in the eye. There needs to be a strategy for involvement which fits the size of your church."
5. Age of the congregation. As the church gets older, young people do not feel attracted to the church. Waggoner said there's no easy answer, but pastors have to serve whomever God brings into their midst.
"Talk to the young people," Waggoner said. "There may be things that can be done to reverse it."
6. Lack of money. Waggoner said he had no easy answers for pastors who say they don't have resources. He did say pastors have to do a better job of teaching about the importance of tithing.
"Too often we preach [on money only] when we go into a building campaign or there's a budget shortfall," Waggoner said. "I think we should teach God's standards on biblical discipleship along the way. It should be part of disciple-making. You honor the Lord with your wealth."
7. Worldliness of the church. Waggoner said he saw in the survey something he called "cultural seepage."
"We allow the world's standards to come into the church," he said. "Sometimes we have propagated that through our arrogance. We're dictatorial, self absorbed. Often preaching becomes a performance. Preaching is not an end but a means. Have we allowed the world to permeate how we think?
"I'm grateful for the Conservative Resurgence," he said of the SBC's theological direction since 1979. "But we have been deceived to think that being conservative is being godly. We have to make sure we are walking in a way that honors God."
8. Age of the pastor. Several said they were getting too old in the survey.
9. Too few people. In the survey, pastors said they couldn't get things done because not enough help was available.
10. Demographics. The community around the church is changing but the church isn't growing.
1. Time. According to Waggoner, 32 percent of the respondents said they were bivocational pastors and didn't have enough hours in the day to do what they were called to do.
"I read comment after comment which said pastors were under pressure to juggle responsibilities," Waggoner said. "The fact is they have 24 hours a day, seven days a week. They worked at their job somewhere and also dealt with the church. They were tired, drained of energy. They try to fulfill their calling and get the job done. There's no easy way to get it all done.
"All pastors fight that battle. Every leader is tired. But, at the end of the day, they trust the Lord to do the best they can with [the] energy they have and just trust Him."
2. Resistance. Small-church pastors said their congregation doesn't want to change, which leads to stagnation. Pastors have to deal with individuals who want to usurp authority from the pastor, forgetting that it's God who controls His church.
"We have to patiently hold the standard high and teach the Word of God," Waggoner said. "It takes a while for the church to grow biblically ... and takes expositional teaching for the church to get healthy. We can't lower the standards of church. Preaching precedes change. We have to raise the bar of expectations."
3. Lack of commitment from members. Many pastors said they deal with apathy and indifference. Waggoner said it doesn't matter what the size of the church is, but small churches feel it more.
"There are no quick fixes," Waggoner said. "It can't be about the man in the pulpit. We hear so much fluff and stuff. We try to sneak up on people with discipleship. You have to start out with discipleship. We've underestimated the power of a godly man or godly woman."
4. Too few workers. If the church's philosophy is that the pastor is a hired gun, the professional, it will wear the pastor out, Waggoner said. He also said most churches do not have a strategy to equip the laity for ministry.
"You have to teach what the Bible says about the pastor's role," Waggoner said. "I think every church should have a class on teaching spiritual gifts so people ... can take the next step on finding a place in the church ministry. You have to look people in the eye. There needs to be a strategy for involvement which fits the size of your church."
5. Age of the congregation. As the church gets older, young people do not feel attracted to the church. Waggoner said there's no easy answer, but pastors have to serve whomever God brings into their midst.
"Talk to the young people," Waggoner said. "There may be things that can be done to reverse it."
6. Lack of money. Waggoner said he had no easy answers for pastors who say they don't have resources. He did say pastors have to do a better job of teaching about the importance of tithing.
"Too often we preach [on money only] when we go into a building campaign or there's a budget shortfall," Waggoner said. "I think we should teach God's standards on biblical discipleship along the way. It should be part of disciple-making. You honor the Lord with your wealth."
7. Worldliness of the church. Waggoner said he saw in the survey something he called "cultural seepage."
"We allow the world's standards to come into the church," he said. "Sometimes we have propagated that through our arrogance. We're dictatorial, self absorbed. Often preaching becomes a performance. Preaching is not an end but a means. Have we allowed the world to permeate how we think?
"I'm grateful for the Conservative Resurgence," he said of the SBC's theological direction since 1979. "But we have been deceived to think that being conservative is being godly. We have to make sure we are walking in a way that honors God."
8. Age of the pastor. Several said they were getting too old in the survey.
9. Too few people. In the survey, pastors said they couldn't get things done because not enough help was available.
10. Demographics. The community around the church is changing but the church isn't growing.
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